Flying pigs and unicorns: Corbyn’s 2019 Conference

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Image: Phil Noble

Jeers of school children echo in the Brighton Assembly Hall as Jeremy Corbyn walks on stage. Like the wolf from red riding hood, with glasses perched on the end of his nose, he peers over at the sea of red that is laid before him. The room is filled with red-ribbon-wearing politicians who absorb every word of his empty promises of reduced university fees and a better NHS.

This is the man who filmed himself sat on the floor of a train to complain about the overcrowding of trains during rush hour, only minutes later seen to be walking up the half empty carriage to sit in one of many empty seats. The man who lacks British values in his dreams of a country without a monarchy and the spread of his republican views.

Corbyn is a man full of criticism for the Tories. However, when it comes to having solutions, he has none. The man is so full of hatred for the Tories that he demands a general election and then, upon having his bluff called by Boris, doesn’t vote the motion through.

Why? Because he knows he’ll lose.

So, as Corbyn enters his fourth year as Labour leader, what has he has pledged for the year ahead?

In terms of their polices on immigration, Labour have voted for a free motion in order to extend and maintain the free movement rights for EU citizens. However, this already contradicts their previous manifesto commitment to ending their freedom of movement rights. To make matters worse, Diane Abbot has been clear in stating that Labour backs a work visa scheme which will obviously mean that free movement is unable to continue. It is clear to see that Labour are simply saying what they want people to hear, rather than actually formulate ideas that are both achievable and do not contradict what they have previously said.

Following from this, Corbyn plans to create a state-owned drugs company capable of making cheaper drugs that the NHS cannot currently afford to produce due to their expense. As wonderful as this sounds, its practicality has to be questioned. Not only does it undermine the current research and investment in new drugs, but it also puts smaller pharmaceutical companies at risk.

One policy that hit the headlines was his plans for a ‘four day working week’. In reality, what he meant was a reduction to 32 hours a week. It is these big glorious ideas he comes up with that are both impractical and unrealistic. This four day working week will effect such a small majority of people within the country that it is not really worth mentioning.

His plans to bring free personal care to the over-65s in England is estimated to cost around £6 billion and this doesn’t even cover all care costs, such as accommodation. His priority should be stabilising the current system through the expansion of services and retention of staff, not coming up with new eye-catching ideas to gain voters attention.

Finally, we reach education. As headlines screeched of his plans to close down all private schools, this is not the actual case. He instead plans on building education policies that redistribute assets of private schools so that they are spread equally across the country’s educational institutions. Whilst at the moment they are claiming not to seize all private school’s assets, rumours are saying that they will in due course put more pressure on private schools. This forebodes a distinct challenge facing private schools in the future.

‘For the many, not the few,’ is the Labour party’s motto. However, the deeper you look into Labour’s upcoming policies on education and social care the more it seems as though these policies are shaped solely around Corbyn’s own political agenda. His whole persona reeks of vengeance and jealousy as he seems to want to punish the middle-class Tories for benefiting from what he never had. Coming from a grammar school education system, his attempts to put a large blow on private school funding is just one key policy that demonstrates his solid hatred for the middle class.

He has failed to come up with any solutions to the current issues facing the country in his new pledges and instead has chosen to come up with more elaborate and idealistic solutions to cover them up. As much as he puts up a good fight in the House of Commons, he does appear to be all mouth and no trousers.

So, when’s the election Mr Wolf?